Chapter 88

Before Wang Qun could decide on the next filming location, the Spring Festival arrived in the blink of an eye.

This year, their show “Retracing the Path of Poverty Alleviation” shone brightly at the station, stealing the spotlight all year long, raking in heaps of sponsorship and advertising fees.

The usually stingy Director Wang became generous. Hearing that Wei Sheng’s New Year’s film “Daji Reborn” was set to premiere on the second day of the Lunar New Year, he boldly declared—

The crew would cover the cost to book a theater, inviting all station colleagues to watch the movie and support Wei Sheng’s big-screen debut!

Wei Sheng: “…No need for that!”

Director Wang, are you trying to get back at me? Want me to die of embarrassment in front of colleagues?

Though he hadn’t seen the rough cut, just thinking about the plot made Wei Sheng cringe so hard his toes curled.

Help! During the New Year, would people really pay to see this kind of fantastical blockbuster in theaters?

Turns out, they would!

And a lot of them.

No surprise—Hua Xia people have a knack for loving a spectacle.

Mainstream films, romances, family-friendly New Year blockbusters—the audience could guess the ending with their eyes closed from the opening scene.

But this “Daji Reborn: Tales of the Entertainment World,” despite its eye-searing title, was unpredictable. Rumor had it, it was full of beauties?

Ahem—let’s be clear, they weren’t obsessed with looks (yeah, right). They were just curious how bad this movie could possibly be…

After all, even before the film hit theaters, Wei Sheng and the other starring actors’ haters were already dancing online, trashing it, mocking it, practically crowning “Daji Reborn” the worst film of the year.

Honestly, if the haters hadn’t made such a fuss, passersby might not have noticed this low-budget New Year’s flick.

But with all the online hate, everyone’s curiosity was piqued.

Worst film of the year? I’ve got to see just how bad it is…

When Xu Tongjun was dragged to the theater by his girlfriend, every pore in his body screamed resistance!

His girlfriend Tang Yuanyuan, who jokingly called herself a fan of countless celebrities, had somehow gone crazy this year, obsessing over poverty alleviation reality shows and developing a new crush on Wei Sheng!

This film, Wei Sheng’s big-screen debut, had her dragging him to the theater at 10 a.m. on the second day of the Lunar New Year.

Seeing the cringeworthy movie title on the ticket stub, Xu Tongjun’s vision darkened, grateful that masks were mandatory in theaters. If anyone recognized him, a dignified law doctorate watching this brainless New Year’s flick, he’d die of shame on the spot, right?

But to his surprise, this absurd, fantastical comedy blockbuster was actually… kind of interesting.

The movie’s pace was lightning-fast. Within three minutes of the opening, before the heroine even entered the entertainment world, she nearly became a “legal case.”

The reborn Daji, still breathtakingly gorgeous, dimming the sun and moon, was spotted by a village thug who harassed local women the moment she came down the mountain.

The thug, seeing Daji’s stunning beauty, was overcome with lustful thoughts.

How novel! She’d always been the one causing harm—being targeted as a victim was a first! Was this guy more powerful than Jiang Ziya?

Daji’s eyes gleamed. Seeing no one around, she gave the thug a bewitching smile: “In broad daylight? How embarrassing. Why don’t we go somewhere private?”

The thug, charmed by her sweet words, followed her, dizzy with desire, to a low wall nearby, behind which was a stinking manure pit.

As the thug eagerly stripped, Daji kicked him into the pit.

To keep him from climbing out, she used magic to topple the wall, burying the pit!

A scream echoed from the pit, but soon the struggling stopped…

Holy crap! Killing someone at the start? Demoness Daji, you never disappoint!

But a rapist deserved no pity. When Daji kicked the thug into the manure pit, the theater erupted in laughter.

Xu Tongjun sat up straight.

This case—his professor had analyzed it in college. It was still a hot topic among law students: the manure pit case.

A woman walking alone after work was attacked by a burly thug. In danger, she lured him to a secluded spot, pushed him into a manure pit while he undressed, kicked him repeatedly to keep him down, and smashed his head with a brick.

Pushing him into the pit was one thing, but continuing to harm him—did that count as excessive self-defense?

“Kind of interesting…” Xu Tongjun grew serious.

Next, Daji, stumbling into a film crew, “accidentally” caught the props team illegally trading wildlife: a white fox meant to “play” a fox spirit.

The crew later claimed to the media they’d bought a Samoyed from a pet store, not a protected animal.

Hearing the crew offered food and lodging, Daji’s eyes gleamed. She freed the pregnant fox, transformed into its likeness, and lazily sat in the cage, ready to mooch off the crew.

Xu Tongjun: “…”

Is this director a lawyer?

Using animals in filming—did it violate wildlife protection laws or constitute pet cruelty? Another hot legal topic!

Then Wei Sheng appeared as the fox clan’s royal uncle, his handsome face spouting suffocating “female virtue training” lines, making Tang Yuanyuan laugh so hard her face nearly split.

This contrast was too adorable, right?

Xu Tongjun, beside her, looked at his girlfriend speechlessly. Did she forget her boyfriend was a law doctorate?

The fox uncle’s three lines had already broken multiple laws—arranged marriage, illegal confinement, and public brawling… This writer was definitely a lawyer!

As the plot unfolded, the fox uncle led a group of broad-shouldered, narrow-waisted, long-legged male fox spirits down the mountain to catch someone, only to nearly be trafficked to an underground nightclub by shady agents.

Tang Yuanyuan: Pfft hahaha~

Xu Tongjun: Here it comes—illegal labor and shady agency gags!

The director was clearly making a heartfelt popcorn flick. Xu Tongjun had bought a big bucket of popcorn for his girlfriend, but the plot was so fast-paced and the laughs so frequent that they stayed glued to the screen, neither dozing nor hitting the bathroom. Soon, the bucket was empty.

Initially reluctant, now urged by his girlfriend to buy more popcorn, Xu Tongjun lingered until he’d seen the latest legal gag, then sprinted out for two more buckets and big iced colas. By the time he returned, the lightning-fast director had already moved on to a new legal gag.

Xu Tongjun: “…” What did I miss? Why’s everyone laughing?

In the “Daji Reborn” theater, laughter shook the room.

Next door, in the biggest IMAX theater, acclaimed director Lin Fei’s New Year’s family comedy “Three-Child Mobilization” was making audiences increasingly furious. Some hot-tempered women even stormed out halfway.

As they left, they gripped their phones, likely rushing to post rants about the director.

What the hell? During the New Year, dodging relatives’ marriage and baby nagging was bad enough. Escaping to the movies for relaxation, only to get hit with a New Year’s flick pushing procreation?

The film had been hyped online as a must-see family comedy, but after watching, audiences were livid.

The director’s intent wasn’t bad, aligning with national pro-birth policies, and the story had Chinese family vibes: a two-child household, already chaotic, where the husband suddenly decides a “triangle is the most stable” and pushes his 40-year-old wife to have a third child.

That’s it? You’d need 500 years of cerebral thrombosis to write such a suffocating plot!

Failing to raise two kids well—shouldn’t parents reflect on their parenting first?

A third child for “triangular balance”? What kind of nonsense theory was that?

Worse, the male writer and director, from a man’s perspective, turned women’s humiliating, infuriating experiences into “jokes” for laughs.

Because of high-risk pregnancy, the third-child mom starts leaking urine, so the husband buys her adult diapers. Fine—but buy them discreetly!

Instead, he brags about it as “doting husband” proof, telling relatives and friends how he picked out her diapers…

The director likely snuck in a sponsored ad for a diaper brand, but women in the theater felt insulted!

Even more absurd, to show the “warmth” of a three-child family, the film included scenes like “pregnant mom waking at 5 a.m. to make love-filled breakfasts and fruit platters” or “dad impulsively picking up the kids from school but going to the wrong one”—things the director found hilarious but left audiences speechless.

What’s funny about that?

Making a high-risk pregnant woman cook at 5 a.m.? Can’t your family afford a one-yuan bun?

And the eldest son’s in middle school, but the dad thinks he’s in elementary? That’s funny?

No! It’s infuriating! Pathetic!

No wonder the two kids are rebellious troublemakers—the dad’s absent, dumping the kids and household mess on the wife!

The kids lack their father’s presence, and now that they’re struggling, instead of making up for it, he wants another kid?

Even worse, the heroine’s brainless too—knowing her husband’s flaws, she still agrees to a third child?

What’s funny about this? Halfway through, audiences only felt pity.

Recalling pre-release hype calling “Three-Child Mobilization” a rare family comedy, tearfully funny and irresistible… Fine! They were indeed irresistible—itching to vent online, unable to suppress their rage!

But with 50-yuan tickets, many didn’t leave mid-show, enduring the anger to the end.

To their dismay, the second half was another ordeal!

The high-risk pregnant woman, with her growing belly, could no longer care for her husband and children. Instead of easing her burden, the husband and kids complained about her, and the director’s deliberate oppressive atmosphere left audiences suffocating.

Then, the second son, rushing for school, spilled water on the floor and didn’t clean it up. The pregnant mother slipped, leading to massive bleeding and nearly losing both her life and the baby’s. The film forced a happy ending with mother and daughter safe.

The audience: ???

I’d rather have wasted the 50 yuan!

Those who stayed for the second half not only wasted money but also precious time.

Some men, originally planning a second child with their wives, left the theater with swollen arms from their wives’ pinches.

“Want a kid? Have it yourself! I’m not doing it! Divorce if you want!”

Angry roars from women echoed in the theater.

During the New Year, spending over 100 yuan didn’t strengthen marriages—it worsened them. Many mothers who experienced postpartum incontinence deeply related, going home to give their husbands a piece of their mind.

After being chewed out by their wives, husbands, too scared to fight back, vented by slamming one-star reviews on “Three-Child Mobilization” on rating sites.

If the site allowed, they’d have given negative stars!

Where was the promised festive family fun? Tricking them into spending money only to nearly get beaten by their wives? Great! Just great! “Three-Child Mobilization,” huh?

More like “Get Lost Mobilization”!

On the second day of the New Year’s box office battle, the “Three-Child Mobilization” crew, still reeling from their opening day success, was stunned by overwhelming backlash.

“It must be our rivals buying negative trending searches to sabotage us!” Director Lin Fei raged, ordering calls to remove the hot searches.

But who was orchestrating this smear campaign?

With a dark expression, Lin Fei opened Weibo’s trending list.

Moments later.

“Great! Just great! ‘Daji Reborn,’ huh? A bunch of nobodies from a web drama, pulling every dirty trick to get attention!”

Seeing the flood of praise for “Daji Reborn” online, Lin Fei thought he’d cracked the case.

Such “punching up” publicity stunts were all too common in the industry.

Apart from the lead actress and a few notable cameos, the “Daji Reborn” crew—from director to writer to key supporting actors—was full of unknowns. During the New Year, who’d pay to see a flop with no box office draw?

Meanwhile, “Three-Child Mobilization” had poured money into promotion from the prep stage, ramping up with heavy online marketing and endorsements from big influencers, topping the New Year’s film buzz.

Naturally, they’d been targeted.

Lin Fei was convinced he’d solved it: “Daji Reborn,” a no-budget flop, couldn’t afford proper promotion, so they latched onto the top-trending “Three-Child Mobilization” for clout, badmouthing one to hype the other. Daring to mess with a veteran like him?

Lin Fei sneered and made a few calls.

On Weibo, Xu Tongjun, a law doctorate who never followed celebrities, wrote his first glowing movie review—and it went viral!

After dropping his girlfriend home post-movie, Xu Tongjun returned to his dorm, opened his laptop, and eagerly typed up his viewing experience.

No exaggeration—from a (legal) professional perspective, “Daji Reborn,” a fantastical comedy in disguise, was a rare gem in recent domestic entertainment, practically a legal education film!

The writer, even if not a law major, had clearly worked on crime dramas, weaving in hot legal topics effortlessly. Most impressively, they tackled controversial cases with a human touch through the actors.

If more people saw this film, it could significantly boost legal awareness in the country, right?

Xu Tongjun wrote a lengthy rave review, slipping in some “personal takes” on the film’s legal gags.

After posting and going to bed, he had no idea that overnight, his review hit over a million views! His Weibo account, with just over 100 followers, gained tens of thousands overnight!

“Holy crap, honey, you’re famous!” Tang Yuanyuan, up early to check Wei Sheng’s fan page, got a task to share a positive “Daji Reborn” review. Opening it, she thought, huh, that profile pic looks familiar!

Checking the account, she gasped—it was her boyfriend’s Weibo!

Seeing him passionately praise “Daji Reborn,” even dropping law doctorate-level rainbow farts she barely understood, Tang Yuanyuan’s face flushed.

So, Junjun complained about her fangirling but secretly supported her? Even waiting until he got home to post, helping promote Wei Sheng’s new movie?

“N-No! I’m not a fan! I just think this movie benefits legal education…”

Before he finished, Tang Yuanyuan planted a loud kiss on him, turning his nerdy pale face bright red.

“Junjun, I love you so much! You don’t know—the fan group’s raving about you, saying our all-night review posts can’t match your viral hit!”

“Really?” Xu Tongjun’s ears burned from the praise.

“Of course! So, Junjun, can you write more?” Tang Yuanyuan’s eyes sparkled at her boyfriend.

Was this the power of knowledge? She only knew how to scream in fandom, envying others who wrote fancy reviews, edited videos, or drew art. Now, she wasn’t jealous—sure, she could only scream, but her boyfriend was amazing!

One post from him outdid Wei Sheng’s entire fan promo team!

God knows how proud she felt in the group, casually mentioning she was the law doctorate’s girlfriend, and how envious everyone was.

Heh—so, to keep basking in that admiration, keep churning out posts, boyfriend!

Xu Tongjun: “…”

But they didn’t expect that, that night, a prominent legal blogger with over a million Weibo followers publicly dissed Xu Tongjun’s post, calling him a junior law student showing off classroom cases like the “Daji Reborn” writer, flaunting ignorance as expertise with no respect for the law.

Xu Tongjun was stunned, clueless about how he’d offended this stranger.

Tang Yuanyuan, a fandom veteran, scrolled through the blogger’s page and, sure enough, found a post promoting “Three-Child Mobilization.”

Clicking it, she exploded. The old-school, preachy tone and subtle misogyny made her blood boil.

What’s this about “women of childbearing age fulfilling duties to society”?

What’s this about “childbearing being women’s greatest value to society”?

Tang Yuanyuan’s vision darkened, unsure where to start ranting.

“Don’t curse them out! Charging in will only hurt Wei Sheng!” Xu Tongjun stopped his girlfriend’s keyboard warrior impulses.

“You’re all Wei Sheng’s fans. If you attack, especially a professor, they can’t touch you but will pin it all on Wei Sheng.”

Tang Yuanyuan, startled, calmed the fan group. Big fans had already issued notices to avoid conflict and focus on promoting the movie.

As for the targeted Xu Tongjun?

Maybe it was a blessing in disguise. His post’s buzz was fading, but the professor’s attack reignited it! In his 30+ years, his name hit Weibo’s trending list for the first time!

His review now had over five million views, a million shares, and his Weibo gained over 100,000 followers!

Xu Tongjun: “…”

(End of Chapter)

———

—Jiang Ziya is a legendary strategist who helped overthrow the corrupt Shang dynasty. Daji, a fox spirit posing as the king’s consort, brought chaos from within. Though both followed divine orders, they were enemies—Jiang led the righteous rebellion, and Daji embodied evil. In the end, Jiang Ziya executed her to restore order.