Chapter 017

Qiao Man warmly invited the two of them to visit their cave.

Zhan Yue and her brother, Zhan Yan, felt a bit embarrassed as they walked in. She apologized repeatedly to Lu Jianxing, “I didn’t know you were staying here. I thought this place was empty.”

“It’s nothing. We ran into Brother Xie and his group on the mountain yesterday.” Lu Jianxing handed them two bamboo tubes filled with water, using the ones from yesterday. “Have some water.”

Zhan Yue took it, looking at the bamboo cup in her hand in surprise. “You even made these?”

Qiao Man said proudly, “Xingxing made them.”

Lu Jianxing had collected quite a few bamboo tubes. The hollow tubes made excellent containers. Right now, one was still propped over the fire, with soup simmering inside.

Zhan Yue looked at the cup in her hand, then at the neat and refreshed Lu Jianxing and Qiao Man, and finally at Zhan Yan beside her.

The siblings didn’t exactly look their best. After spending two or three days in the deep mountains and enduring a day of heavy rain, they were a mess. Their campsite last night hadn’t been flooded, so they’d stayed in their tent. Although they’d escaped the sudden downpour, they’d had to leave the tent at dawn to search for food.

The mountain paths were wet and slippery, making travel difficult. One wrong step meant a fall. Both of them were covered in mud, and their clothes had soaked and dried repeatedly, leaving them as wrinkled as a pile of pickled greens. In contrast, the man and child across from them were clean and tidy, making the siblings feel even more bedraggled.

Zhan Yue: “…”

Was Lu Jianxing some kind of survival master? How could he live so comfortably while looking after a child?

The interior of the cave was quite large, with plenty of space left over. There was even room for another tent. Just as Zhan Yue finished setting up her tent, Qiao Man carefully approached, carrying a bamboo bowl of soup.

He set the soup down and blew on his fingers, which were red from the heat. “This is for you.”

The soup gave off a steaming, savory aroma. Although it lacked seasonings, it contained small fish and shrimp they’d caught after the rain stopped. While those wouldn’t fill a stomach, they made the broth delicious. After three days of wilderness survival, Zhan Yue instinctively swallowed hard at the scent of the soup.

Resisting the temptation, she tried to decline. “No, thank you. We have our own food.”

“It’s okay, we have plenty.” Qiao Man looked up at her with an adorable expression. “I heard your stomach growling.”

As he spoke, a loud rumble echoed from Zhan Yue’s stomach. She clutched her midsection in embarrassment.

Zhan Yan took out the food they’d found from his backpack. “Then we’ll trade with you.”

Qiao Man accepted the trade and warmly invited them to sit by the fire. As darkness fell, the temperature in the cave dropped. Sitting by the fire and sipping hot soup was incredibly comfortable.

Upon learning that the two had found the cave before the rain and had prepared enough firewood and food to stay dry the whole time, Zhan Yue’s envy was palpable. “You guys are way too lucky!”

It wasn’t luck; it was a bit of metaphysics.

Lu Jianxing didn’t refute her. He picked up the hot water nearby. “More?”

Zhan Yue wasn’t polite and held out her bamboo tube. “Thanks.”

“My brother and I haven’t had such good luck. We got lost several times in these mountains. When it poured last night, we thought we’d be fine in the tent, but there was too much rain and it flooded us out. The rain didn’t stop today either, so we had to keep moving. The ground was so slippery I almost slid down a slope. Luckily, my brother was there to grab me,” Zhan Yue said, still shaken.

Falling down that slope would have meant serious injury, if not death. With half the survival challenge still ahead, getting hurt was the last thing they needed.

As she spoke, her eyelid twitched. Suddenly, she slapped her own face hard. The sound startled Qiao Man, who sat bolt upright, his eyes wide. “What happened?!”

Zhan Yue opened her hand to reveal a bloody, dead mosquito in her palm.

Without batting an eye, she patted her palm and rummaged through her backpack. “It’s fine. I brought insect repellent spray.”

There were many insects on the mountain, and Zhan Yue was the type who naturally attracted mosquitoes. She’d brought a large bottle of repellent, but even with it, she couldn’t escape the bites. Her exposed skin was covered in red welts. Because her skin was fair, the bites were particularly noticeable.

But because her overall appearance was so disheveled, the bug bites didn’t seem that prominent by comparison.

Zhan Yue pulled out the spray. Instead of using it on herself first, she beckoned to Qiao Man. “Come here, sweetie. Let me spray some on you.”

A child’s skin was tender; he’d surely be a favorite target for the mosquitoes.

When Qiao Man came over and she prepared to press the nozzle, she suddenly let out a confused “Huh?”

The child’s face was fair and smooth. Forget mosquito bites, there wasn’t even a single red dot. She held his chubby face, looking it over, then checked his arms and legs. She searched his entire body but couldn’t find a single bite.

It wasn’t just Qiao Man; Lu Jianxing was the same.

Zhan Yue held the spray and looked back at the insects buzzing around the cave. One even landed on the back of her hand. If she looked closely, all the bugs were clustered on her and her brother’s side of the cave. It was as if a clear line had been drawn; not a single insect crossed over to the other side.

She wondered, “Why aren’t the mosquitoes biting you?”

Qiao Man said as a matter of course, “We’re wearing Insect Repellent Talismans.”

“A… what kind of talisman?”

“An Insect Repellent Talisman.” Qiao Man reached into his pocket and pulled out a piece of Yellow Talisman Paper.

Lu Jianxing realized the truth and pulled one from his own pocket as well. “So that’s why you tuck a piece of Talisman Paper on me every day. It’s for repelling insects.”

Zhan Yue: “…”

Zhan Yan: “…”

Bullet chat: […]

[I haven’t had much schooling, so don’t lie to me.]

[Here it comes, here it comes! The familiar Master Xiao Man has arrived.]

[But Xiao Man’s talismans can even start fires. Maybe the insect repellent thing is real too…]

[If it were before, I wouldn’t believe it. But compared to Pei Xiwang almost getting struck by lightning, what’s an Insect Repellent Talisman?]

Zhan Yue hadn’t seen the livestream. She hadn’t seen Qiao Man use talismans to start fires, use a Luo Pan to find the way, or tell Pei Xiwang’s fortune. But that didn’t stop her curiosity.

“What Insect Repellent Talisman?” Zhan Yue asked with great interest. “Can I see it?”

Qiao Man generously handed it to her.

The strange runes drawn in cinnabar on the yellow talisman paper looked like props from a TV show. Zhan Yue turned the paper over several times, but she couldn’t see anything special about it.

She decided to take the talisman away from the fire and head toward the overgrown area at the cave entrance. Once night fell, the insects here became even more numerous. Usually, if she stood near the grass for even a moment, her legs would be covered in mosquito bites.

But this time, Zhan Yue waited patiently for a good while, yet not a single bug landed on her.

She was stunned.

She hadn’t used any repellent spray, and the bugs were flying right in front of her eyes. Normally, she would have been bitten beyond recognition by now, but currently, forget mosquitoes, even the ants on the ground were veering around her.

Could this Insect Repellent Talisman actually work?!

Zhan Yue was so moved she was nearly in tears!

Heaven knew how long these insects had been tormenting her.

The mountain bugs were particularly venomous. Once bitten, the itch would last for days, and she couldn’t stop herself from scratching. Over the last few days, besides the poor food and sleep on the mountain, she had suffered quite a bit from these pests.

Whether it was real or fake didn’t matter – as long as it worked, it was the real deal!

This Insect Repellent Talisman was far more effective than the spray she had brought. If she had been carrying this from the start… wait, if she remembered correctly, when they were showing their gear before setting out, hadn’t Qiao Man brought a whole backpack full of yellow talisman paper?

“Sweetie!”

Zhan Yue ran back joyfully. “Do you have any more of these Insect Repellent Talismans? Can you sell some to me?”

Qiao Man replied generously, “Sure.”

“That’s wonderful!”

Qiao Man opened his Little Yellow Duck Backpack. To everyone else, the talismans inside looked identical, with nearly the same patterns, but he precisely pulled out a small stack.

“One Insect Repellent Talisman only lasts for half a day. You have to remember to replace it.”

Zhan Yue nodded repeatedly, clutching them like a precious treasure. “Okay, okay.”

Zhan Yan chimed in, “We don’t have any money on us. Can we trade something else? Or we can pay you after the show ends.”

“I don’t want money.”

Qiao Man waved a small hand and said grandly, “They’re a gift for you.”

“Is that really okay?” Zhan Yue felt a bit embarrassed to take them now. “These must be very valuable.”

She didn’t know how much a single talisman cost, but if it actually worked, it had to be worth a lot.

Qiao Man shook his head. “They aren’t expensive. I drew them myself.”

“You drew them yourself?”

“Insect Repellent Talismans are very simple. I could draw them when I was two.” Qiao Man patted his backpack. “I have plenty more.”

“You know how to draw talismans?” Zhan Yue’s curiosity was piqued. “I’ve only heard of Taoists drawing talismans. Sweetie, you’re so amazing. Are you a little Taoist?”

“I am.”

Qiao Man puffed out his chest and said confidently, “My Master said I’m the most talented person he’s ever seen. I’m very impressive!”

Zhan Yue played along with a gasp of surprise. “Wow! You’re that amazing? Then your Master must be incredible too, right?”

Qiao Man: “Of course! He even has a certificate!”

Xiao Man was so envious.

Master had said he had to wait until he was an adult – when Xiao Man was an independent grown-up – before he could be taken to get a Taoist Certificate¹. Sigh, now that he had transmigrated, he wondered if the people issuing the certificates could count the years he’d missed in between.

Right now, Xiao Man was only five. Not only did he lack a Taoist Certificate, he even had to ask Xingxing for money just to buy ice cream.

Feeling dejected, Qiao Man turned and curled into Lu Jianxing’s arms.

Lu Jianxing patted his head and explained to the siblings opposite them, “Xiao Man was the one who found this cave.”

Zhan Yue: “Wow, so impressive!”

Even Zhan Yan was curious now. “Like the Taoists I see on TV? Are those talismans real? I always thought real-life Taoists were all scammers.”

Zhan Yue thumped him. “That Insect Repellent Talisman works perfectly. The mosquitoes won’t even come near me. How could it be fake?”

She was truly fed up with those bugs. As long as it kept them away, she’d believe him even if he said he could fly!

Zhan Yan rubbed the spot where his sister hit him and muttered, “I was just saying…”

Zhan Yue ignored him and turned back to ask, “Sweetie, Taoists on TV can also do fortune-telling. Can you do fortune-telling?”

Qiao Man: “My readings are very accurate!”

“Really?” Zhan Yue was overjoyed and said excitedly, “Then take a look – when will I become a first-tier star?”

Zhan Yan: “…”

Lu Jianxing: “…”

The audience: […]

Translator’s Notes