Chapter 48

She’s not here, and no one is here to make me happy.

—Zhang Lurang

—

The sky looked as if it had been painted with thick ink, resembling a vast, boundless black sea.

Outside, the leaves rustled under the cold wind, and fallen leaves swirled along with the gusts.

Occasionally, a few fireworks exploded in the sky, celebrating the arrival of New Year’s Eve tomorrow.

After washing up, Su Zai Zai returned to her room.

She climbed onto her bed in one swift motion, burrowed herself under the blanket, and called Zhang Lurang.

He picked up quickly.

Because the blanket was stuffy, her voice sounded a little muffled. “Lurang.”

His voice, hoarse from a cough and carrying a bit of nasal tone, was softer than usual.

“What’s wrong?”

“How are you spending New Year’s Eve tomorrow?”

There was a brief pause on Zhang Lurang’s end, as if he were thinking. Soon, he answered, “With my uncle. He’s not going back to B City this year.”

“Oh.” Su Zai Zai lifted the blanket slightly, looking a little hesitant. “I’ll be going to my grandparents’ house tomorrow. It’s the same every year…”

“Mm.”

“But I’ll be back after the reunion dinner, though it’ll be a bit late.”

Only then did Zhang Lurang catch the underlying meaning in her words. He lowered his gaze and chuckled silently. “Zai Zai.”

His voice traveled through the phone, carrying an inexplicable tenderness.

It was rare for him to call her like that, and Su Zai Zai felt a little flattered.

She couldn’t help but curl up in her blanket and roll around on the bed.

The noise wasn’t small, and Zhang Lurang could hear the rustling sounds clearly from the other end of the call.

His face inevitably grew warm. He licked his lips and said softly, “I’ll give you a New Year’s gift when you’re back.”

“What gift?” Su Zai Zai asked excitedly.

Hearing that, Zhang Lurang hesitated for a moment before asking, “What do you want?”

Su Zai Zai answered without hesitation, “Your body.”

“……”

“To be honest, I’ve been thinking about it since our first year of high school.”

“……”

“You’ve kept me pure for three years.”

Zhang Lurang remained silent.

The next second, Su Zai Zai suddenly corrected herself, “Actually, it should be ten years, right?”

“……”

“Ten years… Am I still underestimating you?” she muttered gloomily.

Zhang Lurang opened his mouth, wanting to refute, but in the end, he said nothing.

His fingers tapped lightly on the soft blanket, as if feeling a little restless.

After a long pause, Su Zai Zai shamelessly asked, “Have you ever dreamed about it?”

The question came out of nowhere, catching Zhang Lurang off guard.

It took him a moment to process, and the moment he did, his breathing hitched.

His Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed. Feeling flustered, he hurriedly said, “I’m going to sleep.”

Su Zai Zai pulled the phone away from her ear and glanced at the time.

It was 10:30 PM.

Zhang Lurang had always had a strict sleep schedule, so she didn’t tease him any further.

She reached out to turn off the bedside lamp and grinned. “Alright, go to sleep. Good night.”

Hearing her words, Zhang Lurang suppressed the strange stir in his heart and scolded her, “Go to sleep too. Stop staying up late scrolling through Weibo.”

“Got it.”

After hanging up, Su Zai Zai dismissed the idea of scrolling Weibo, obediently placed her phone on the bedside table, closed the curtains, tucked herself in, and went to sleep.

—

On the other side.

Normally, Zhang Lurang would have been asleep by this hour, but tonight, he kept tossing and turning in bed.

His thoughts were unclear, yet his entire being seemed oddly restless.

Ten minutes later, he sat up.

He touched his slightly sweaty forehead, got out of bed, and walked into the bathroom.

Soon, the sound of running water filled the quiet night.

—

New Year’s Eve.

The dining table, with only two people seated, was mostly silent, except for the occasional clinking of utensils.

Lin Mao swallowed a mouthful of food and said, “Go turn on the TV.”

Zhang Lurang instinctively set down his chopsticks, about to comply, when Lin Mao continued, “With some background noise, it won’t feel so pathetic.”

“……”

“Sigh, kids these days barely talk.”

Zhang Lurang thought for a moment before replying seriously, “I don’t know what to say to you.”

Lin Mao choked on his words. “Are you saying there’s a generation gap between us?”

Zhang Lurang said nothing, lowering his head to continue eating, as if tacitly agreeing.

His cold expression softened slightly, and the corners of his mouth secretly curved up.

Lin Mao raised an eyebrow but didn’t mind too much.

After a while, he suddenly remembered something. “You haven’t contacted your parents all semester?”

At the mention of this, Zhang Lurang’s mood immediately soured. “Mm.”

“You don’t answer their calls?”

“……”

“You’re not going home for New Year’s, so your mom called me a bunch of times to scold me.”

Hearing that, Zhang Lurang couldn’t help but ask, “Why scold you?”

“Well, I didn’t really listen carefully.”

“……”

“Something about me spoiling you too much or interfering too much?”

After saying that, Lin Mao suddenly understood something. “No wonder you don’t answer her calls.”

Zhang Lurang continued eating in silence.

Lin Mao sighed and didn’t joke around anymore.

“Call them later.”

Zhang Lurang’s chopsticks paused mid-air, his expression reluctant.

Seeing Lin Mao’s serious face, he eventually compromised and nodded. “Got it.”

After dinner, Zhang Lurang returned to his room.

Just then, his phone rang.

It was a call from A’Li.

Zhang Lurang swiped across the screen to answer, bringing the phone to his ear.

A’Li’s cheerful voice came through, “Bro! Happy New Year!”

Zhang Lurang couldn’t help but smile slightly. “Happy New Year.”

After that, both sides fell into silence at the same time.

A moment later, A’Li hesitantly asked, “Are you really not coming home for New Year’s?”

“Mm.”

“Mom and Dad have been arguing a lot lately…”

“I think Mom might go to Z City to see you after the New Year.”

“Maybe you should give her a call. She barely ate anything at the New Year’s Eve dinner tonight…”

“Bro, don’t be too…” Zhang Luli hesitated, his voice turning muffled. “You can’t just decide not to come back and actually not come back…”

Zhang Lurang stared at the lines on his palm, lost in thought. “Got it.”

Before hanging up, he heard Zhang Luli speak again, his voice careful.

“Bro, I want to apply for grad school at Z University…”

Zhang Lurang didn’t think much of it and replied flatly, “It’s your choice.”

—

After hesitating for a while, Zhang Lurang finally called his mother.

The phone barely rang once before she picked up, but she didn’t speak right away.

Both sides seemed to be locked in a silent standoff.

In the end, it was Zhang’s mother who gave in first, her voice sharp with anger. “Zhang Lurang, do you still see me as your mother? You ignore my calls, and now you won’t even come home for the New Year?”

Zhang Lurang remained silent.

After a moment, her voice lowered, as if suppressing her frustration.

“It was wrong of your father and me to change your major preference. If you want to study computer science, then study it properly. I won’t interfere with you as much during university.”

Zhang Lurang’s brow eased slightly, a faint sense of relief settling in—though it didn’t last long.

The next second, he heard her continue.

“But you must come home for the holidays! Have you been around your uncle for too long? Do you even care about me and your father anymore?”

Zhang Lurang pressed his lips together and said softly, “I—”

His mother cut him off, her frustration growing.

“I’m your mother—would I ever harm you? What’s wrong with B University’s finance program? You could graduate and go straight into the family business. You wouldn’t even have to suffer under someone else!”

“…”

“Your brother never gave us this much trouble. You insisted on transferring schools in ninth grade despite different exam requirements, then went to Z City for high school for a whole year. You didn’t even discuss your university application with us and just submitted it yourself. Do you think that was right?”

Zhang Lurang had rarely seen his mother so furious.

Oddly enough, his urge to argue back disappeared. His eyes stung.

A deep sense of helplessness washed over him, swallowing him whole.

After a long silence, Zhang Lurang suddenly blurted out a name—Su Zai Zai.

His mother hesitated, her voice lowering. “You—”

Before she could finish, Zhang Lurang finally lost his temper. Like a child, he raised his voice and cut her off.

“Every time she talks about her parents, her eyes are full of pride. No matter what she does, she’s fearless. Because she has parents who are wonderful and love her deeply.”

His voice grew quieter, almost like a murmur.

There was something raw in his words, something that carried the weight of unshed tears.

“…I’m really envious.”

—

On the other end of the line, his mother seemed completely caught off guard.

She didn’t say a single word.

Zhang Lurang sat in a daze for a while before snapping back to reality and hanging up.

Lowering his gaze, he scrolled through his phone and saw a series of messages Su Zai Zai had sent him just minutes ago.

—Hahaha, I told my mom today!

—I mentioned you!!

—She said since I like you so much, she’s sure she’ll like you too, hehe.

Zhang Lurang tugged at the corner of his lips, typing back at a leisurely pace.

—That’s good.