Chapter 39: Juanjuan’s Unease

She was still young, her mind not yet fully formed. Her parents and brothers had all changed into something else. All she could do was keep her mouth shut and pretend she didn’t hear the voices.

With Bai Yunxing helping out, things were indeed much easier for Juanjuan.

Watching him skillfully wash vegetables, light the fire, and stir-fry the food, Juanjuan couldn’t help but compare him to her parents. She asked curiously, “Big Brother, how do you know how to do all this?”

The moment the words left her mouth, both Juanjuan and Bai Yunxing froze.

Bai Yunxing had been the tenth child in his family, with only thirteen juniors in total. Below him was just one younger male cousin—the rest were all older brothers and sisters. He had always envied his friends who had younger sisters, instead of a cousin who spent his days stealing bird eggs and causing endless trouble for their father and grandfather.

He’d often heard his friends say that having a younger sister was different from having a younger brother. Now, he could see that it truly was.

Half a month before his death, a letter had arrived from the Capital City, reaching the northern frontier. It said that his aunt was three months pregnant, though they didn’t yet know if it was a boy or a girl.

His uncle had been overjoyed.

But now…

【I wonder if the family has received news of my death. Will they be worried? And what about Little Thirteen? I died saving him… I hope the child doesn’t fall into despair.】

Juanjuan sat quietly, listening to the thoughts echoing in her big brother’s heart.

She could almost picture the vague outlines of the family he spoke of.

She thought, Big Brother must have been deeply loved by his family.

And he must have loved that younger cousin of his very much too.

Otherwise, why would he have died for him?

As for herself, she both envied and felt lucky—envied that Big Brother had once had such a loving family, and lucky that he had survived by inhabiting her own brother’s body. Now, he had a second chance to find his parents again.

But her own real big brother, the one who used to bully her… was he truly dead?

Her father, mother, Eldest Brother, Big Brother, and Third Brother—they had all changed.

They had become someone else. No one else knew, only she did.

Only she knew that her real family was already gone.

Juanjuan suddenly didn’t know how to feel. She couldn’t quite put it into words.

Was she sad?

Yes, she was.

Her family had died. They weren’t evil people. They hadn’t committed any crimes. At just four years old, Juanjuan couldn’t harden her heart enough to watch lives slip away without feeling anything.

Was she happy?

Yes, she was.

Because now, she seemed to have the kind of parents she’d only ever dreamed of—ones who loved her, coddled her, praised her. And three older brothers who all seemed so capable.

But in the quiet of night, or just after waking up, Juanjuan always felt uneasy.

She didn’t know why she could hear her parents’ and brothers’ thoughts.

She didn’t know if they would disappear just as suddenly as they had appeared.

She didn’t know who they truly were.

She was afraid she wasn’t smart enough, that something she said might make them suspicious.

The unknown—more than anything—was what stirred her emotions.

Bai Yunxing turned his head and saw her, a tiny figure sitting at the kitchen door, hugging her knees.

Outside, the dawn light had begun to break, and the first rays of sunlight were filtering in. But for some reason, he felt like his little sister, sitting there at the threshold, was a child abandoned to the darkness.

“Juanjuan.”

He couldn’t help but call out to her.

Juanjuan turned her head in a daze, looking at her Big Brother, who was standing on a stool cooking.

Bai Yunxing gave the little one a gentle smile. “Come call Mom and Dad to eat. Breakfast’s ready!”

“Okay!”

Juanjuan nodded and immediately got up to fetch her parents and the other two brothers for breakfast.

Watching the little girl dash off on her short legs, full of energy again, Bai Yunxing stretched lazily.

He didn’t know what she had been thinking just now, but he liked seeing her like this—moving around, full of life.

Sometimes, when you move, you can forget a lot of things, at least for a while.

“Did Big Brother make breakfast today? So impressive!”

Jiang Dai looked at the table—wild vegetable rice porridge and coarse wheat cakes with minced meat—and couldn’t help but think…

【Is this the useless life of the post-00s generation, who can’t compare to the old or the young?】

【For real, being spoiled by the kids feels amazing. Maybe it’s a bit shameless, but… these little ones are just too capable!!!】

【Becoming a mom without any pain, farming and getting rich, having both money and kids—what a winner in life! Woohoo! And it even rhymes!】

Juanjuan: …

See? Mom’s personality really doesn’t match her appearance—so loud and dramatic.

Bai Yunan took a bite of the cake. To boost his favorability score, he relied on his Apocalypse survival habits—saying what people wanted to hear, whether they were human or ghost—and went all in.

“Juanjuan’s cooking is still the best!”

Juanjuan looked at Third Brother. “Really?”

Bai Yunan looked back at her. For some reason, when the little one stared at him with those innocent, slightly world-weary puppy eyes, he suddenly felt a bit guilty.

“Really!”

But he still said it, sounding absolutely certain.

Only Juanjuan could hear what he was really thinking inside.

Third Brother said: 【Honestly, it’s all the same. Juanjuan’s just a little more practiced. None of it tastes as good as the pre-made meals in my space that I haven’t unlocked yet!】

Juanjuan was biting into a flatbread.

See? Third Brother said it—neither her cooking nor Second Brother’s tasted any good.

So, just after Bai Yun’an had praised little Juanjuan, he was shocked to see his Favorability Points drop from 1 to 0.

Bai Yun’an: …

【What?! I—damn it! What’s with this kid?!】

【If compliments don’t work, am I supposed to threaten her or something?!】

【System, what the hell? You gave me this annoying little brat? I came here to enjoy myself, okay? To enjoy! Get it?!】

【I’ve had enough! This stupid flatbread, the open-air toilet, this backward dump, and this stubborn little gremlin who won’t listen to reason!】

【And this weak, pathetic body!】

“I’m full.”

Juanjuan suddenly stood up, ignoring the confused looks from her parents and brothers, and turned to leave.

She didn’t want to hear anything else Third Brother had to say.

Watching the little girl get up and huff away, Bai Tian blinked and asked Jiang Dai, “What’s wrong with Juanjuan?”

Clearly, he still didn’t understand how little girls thought.

Jiang Dai blinked too, clearly puzzled. She hesitated before saying, “Could it be…”

She replayed the scene in her mind, recalling what had happened just before Juanjuan’s mood shifted. Her eyes landed on Bai Yun’an—the last person who had spoken to Juanjuan.

Bai Yun’an: …

Oh come on, how is this my fault again?!

He had genuinely complimented the kid’s cooking just now!

He even threw Second Brother under the bus to make her look better! That’s the classic play—step on one to lift the other!

How could this possibly be blamed on him?!

“Maybe it’s because Third Brother didn’t praise Second Brother’s cooking?”

Bai Tian: …

What exactly was I expecting here?

Jiang Dai quickly took a few bites of her flatbread, then stood up. “I’ll go check on her!”

To most adults, a child suddenly walking off might not seem like a big deal.

But to Jiang Dai, as a mother, it was something worth checking on.

Maybe in ancient times, no one cared about a child’s emotional state—as long as they weren’t starving, everything else was irrelevant.

But Jiang Dai wasn’t like that.

She understood that children aren’t objects. No matter how small, they’re still people—with feelings and thoughts.

Even adults get stuck in their own heads.

Kids need even more emotional attention.

So…

“Raising a kid is such a pain! And now I’ve got four at once! What a thrill…” Jiang Dai muttered under her breath, on the verge of a breakdown.

But by the time she reached Juanjuan, she had already composed herself.

She saw the little one cleaning out the chicken coop and called out, “Juanjuan~”

Juanjuan turned to look at her mother, as if she already knew why she’d come after her.

“Mom, I’m fine.”

Jiang Dai: 【Yeah, right! Like I’m buying that.】

She asked gently, “Did something your Third Brother said upset you?”

Juanjuan clearly froze for a moment—she hadn’t expected her mom to guess so accurately.

To adults, a child’s thoughts are often written all over their face, impossible to hide.

Jiang Dai: 【Looks like I hit the mark.】

【Now I finally get why I could never fool my mom when I was little—these little reactions are way too obvious.】

Since her mom had already figured it out, Juanjuan didn’t bother denying it.

Jiang Dai asked, “Then can you tell Mom why you don’t like Third Brother right now?”

【If I remember correctly, Third Brother did compliment Juanjuan just now. He didn’t even mention Second Brother’s cooking—just said Juanjuan’s food wasn’t tasty.】

【But if it was a compliment, why did Juanjuan get upset?】

Juanjuan looked at her mother, wanting to say that Third Brother didn’t really mean it—that he was faking it. But she held back.

After a moment of thought, she finally said, “Third Brother doesn’t tell the truth. He always lies to me. He doesn’t actually like me—I overheard him last time.”

“Then you should just say it out loud, don’t bottle it up!”

Bai Tian’s voice came from behind them.

Jiang Dai’s eyes lit up, but then she frowned slightly and muttered under her breath, “Bottling it up…”

【Wait a second—did they even have the term ‘bottling up’ in ancient times? No way, right?】

She looked at her conveniently placed husband squatting beside her and asked tentatively, “Bottling up?”

Bai Tian nodded. “Yes, bottling up. As the name suggests, it means using up your own energy by keeping things inside. A classic symptom is when something keeps weighing on your heart and slowly wears you down.”

Juanjuan: …Still didn’t quite get it.

Jiang Dai: 【Wait a minute, that explanation…】